Helmet-less skulls full of mush in Florida
Here's a news flash for you: A recent federal study found motorcycle fatalities in Florida increased more than 81 percent, and the number of deaths for riders younger than 21 nearly tripled in three years after Florida legislators repealed a law requiring riders to wear a helmet. Gee, ya think?
And not only that, those lovable, bumbling, stumbling hairballs over at the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration also found injuries have become more expensive to treat. Seems that the average hospital cost to treat a head injury was $45,602 -- more than four times the $10,000 insurance non-helmeted riders are required to carry in Florida.
Perhaps the biggest disappointment of the study was that helmet use has declined significantly in riders younger than 21, even though state statute requires them to wear helmets. Of course, there IS that nifty benefit of thinning out the herd . . . Now mind you, this is not a sermon, nor is it a crusade to get all scooter jockeys to wear helmets. On the contrary, B2 will defend to the death anyone's right to be as stupid as they choose to be . . . and Ol' B2 prefers stupidity to remain a matter of choice -- where else would we get those neat Jackass reality clips and world's worst police videos?
But Ol' B2 also prefers that motorcyclists who have not already splattered their cranial fluids and gray matter over our thoroughfares use them to reasonably and logically think this helmet-free piffle through. I mean, even the most intellectually-challenged rider on the planet understands that statistically speaking, helmeted riders have a greater than 60 percent chance to survive a serious spill than do non-helmeted riders. And bank on this: ALL riders will, at some point, dump their scooters and eat asphalt. That's a fact, Jack.
"But B2, B2!" you pathetically whine, "There are so many advantages to riding without a helmet!" Yeah, I know -- I've heard them all from my demented friends. "My helmet makes my head sweat;" "My vision is reduced wearing a helmet;" "I can't hear sirens with a helmet;" "Chicks dig scars;" "Like, I feel like I'm, like, flying;" or "Once I got a bee stuck up in my helmet." I can go on and on but it's all bovine scatology, all of it.
The fact is, ALL naked-skulled riders do so because they think they look cool. Period. Finito. End of story. I could at least respect these goobers if they said, "I know it's dumb, but I do it because the wind feels good." Nope, the real reason is: Without a helmet the wannabes think they are the Angels' Sonny Barger, Wyatt (Fonda) in Easy Rider, or Johnny Strabler (Brando) in The Wild One. Puhleeze!
So get real, all you tools and toolettes. If you're going to be stupid, at least be honestly stupid.